Impacted Wisdom
by roobook
Summary: Before William Lewis. Nick and Olivia are together. What happens when Olivia gets hurt, but can't tell anyone? What happens to Olivia?
1. Chapter 1

"I'm not a weak little thing, Nick!"

"I never said you were!"

"You don't have to say it."

"I'm just trying to protect you." He steps towards me, taking my hand. I pull it away.

"You should know by now that I don't need protection."

"Because of what we do I see rapist and murderers everywhere. Olivia, I don't want to get a call telling me…"

"I knew it."

"Knew what?"

"I'm not a fragile thing, I'm going out. If anyone attacks me, I'll fight them off."

"We literally just put a serial rapist and murder away. You have to understand why I would just want you here tonight."

"I understand how you see me."

"Olivia, please."

"Remember what I'm wearing in case you have to identify my body." I storm out, slamming the door.

Here's a piece of advice, don't drive when emotional. I knew this but went for it anyway. It was only eight at night and I was going to eat with some friends. The rage of my fight with Nick was fresh on my mind. Due to the reason I was speeding and went right through a red light. Very soon after I saw lights and heard a siren. I knew what I had done. I pulled over. I was driving through Clinton Hill which is why there was no one else on the road. Once I pulled over I opened my glove box to get my registration, got my license out of my wallet, and rolling down my window.

"Do you know why we pulled you over?"

"Listen, I am a cop myself."

"License and registration please." I roll my eyes and give it to him, not even caring to look at him.

"Please get out of the car, Ms. Benson."

"Why, I haven't done anything wrong." I finally look to him only to see a flashlight making me unable to see his face.

"I smell alcohol on your breath. Get out before this gets ugly." I step out of the car, annoyed.

"I'll entertain you." I told myself don't start anything, just get this over with.

"Hands on the car and spread them." He starts patting me down and then slips his hand into my panties. I become frozen.

He puts his mouth right next to my ear. "I know you like what I'm doing, I can feel it. Once you admit you like it, I'll stop." I grit my teeth.

I knew I should just do what he says, I'd seen what happens to the women who don't.

"Okay, I like it." Why couldn't I fight back? Why couldn't I move?

"Call me Officer." I'm feeling my body respond to the stimulus.

"Officer, I like it." He keeps going. I like this, I like the way this feels.

"Tell me you like that I'm playing with your pussy." Tears start to sting my eyes.

"Officer, I like you touching me."

"Not exactly what I was looking for, but time is of the essence." There's a pause. "Come get her keys." He yells this, and another man appears.

He keeps his hand in my panties. I'm trying to stop it, but the wave comes over me, my body betraying me. He takes his hand out of my pants and proceeds to handcuff me, laughing.

As his hands touch me, and I can feel that one is damp. I feel him take my phone out of my back pocket.

I kept telling myself fight back. Fight back Olivia. Fight back.

He takes me back to the patrol car and throws me in the back. He gets in the driver seat and starts driving.

"I know how to manipulate a woman's body." He says this as he drives off.

All I can do is cry.

The car stops. My heart stops. The door opens, and he grabs me, pulling me out of the car. He's walking me to a warehouse. I hear a car and turn my head, it's my car. He holds onto me and opens the door. I hear footsteps following us, the second man. Lights hit me, and I squint. I feel him push me down. I hit a mattress. I let out a grunt. I'm laying on my handcuffed hands looking up at the two men standing over me.

My phone start to ring. I look over and see the first one look at it.

"That's Nick Amaro." The second one responds.

"Aw, so cute. Look, they're kissing." My contact photo.

"Don't talk about Nick." Number one takes my phone, throws it on the ground, and smashes it with his foot. Both laugh.

"Let's get started then." Number one smiles at me.

They surround me. I then notice the restraints attached to the floor. I feel my legs being torn apart, but I won't let them.

My legs are torn apart.

I'm pulled into a sitting position and my handcuffed hands forced above my head. They push me down again. I hear a click and my hands are freed, but I quickly feel them being separated. My hands are restrained above my head, my legs forced to be spread open. I was spread eagle. This was it.

I close my eyes.

I feel my clothes being ripped and torn off me. I feel so cold. I feel naked, I am. I hear them taking off their clothes and I start fighting the restraints, opening my eyes, screaming.

"There's the Olivia Benson we all know and love." I look into number ones eyes.

"You don't know me." Number two gets on top of me and we make eye contact.

"Maybe, but I can feel you." He twists my nipples and I bite down, not making a sound. His hands reach down to my core and he's getting ready to enter me. My breathing is getting heavy and shallow.

"Please, you don't have to do this." He smiles at me.

"No, I want to." He enters me with so much force. I open my mouth, but I won't let a scream out.

Once he finishes the other gets on top of me. This one is being so gentle, kissing my neck.

"I know you enjoyed our little encounter earlier." His hands go down to my core, stimulating me again.

"You're a rapist, not my lover." He continues, and my breathing becomes hitched, my back arching.

"Sure, but I made you cum once and I'm about to do it again. It's hard saying how you hated this when I gave you so much pleasure."

"Fuck you." It happens again.

"It's so easy with you, I assume Nick doesn't pleasure you the way I do."

I want to fight back with my words, but all I can do is cry.

Once he finishes, he gets off the bed.

"I'll grab her hands you get the feet."

"What, what are you doing." I feel my restraints being undone, but then I'm flipped over onto my stomach. I feel the cold of the steel around my ankles and wrists again. "What is going on?"

"Have you ever done anal Olivia?" I feel the weight shift on the mattress and a body hovering just above me. This time I can't hold back a scream.

He finished and the other started. It didn't matter how gentle they could be, it hurt. There was no lube, no warning. As the second got off me he let out a chuckle.

"You're bleeding." I had no reaction, all I could do was shake. They had just taken everything from me.

"Do you have any extra clothes in your car." I couldn't tell the difference between one and two anymore, they just morphed into one monster.

"I have a gym bag, back seat." The words were robotic.

I hear them put their clothes back on and one leave. While one is gone the other unlocks my restraints, but I don't move.

"Here." I turn to see the gym bag on the floor.

I put the clothes on, looking at what's left of the clothes I was wearing on the floor. What I did next I can't explain. I stare at the ground.

"Can you drive me home?" They both chuckle.

"Of course, Ms. Benson. You clean it up and meet me by her place. Let's go."

The doors are unlocked and the keys sitting on the driver's seat. This time I get to sit in the front. My head feels so heavy and I feel so weak. He starts driving, clearly knowing where I live. We get to my apartment complex and he pulls a bottle of pills out of his pocket, spilling some pills into his hand.

"Take these. Take them and I'm gone." I don't even look for water, I grab them and swallow. He smiles and proceeds to park the car. "Your registration is in the glove box and your license back in your wallet, your wallet is in your pocket book." He hands my pocketbook to me and we both step out of the car.

"Don't forget your keys." He throws them to me. "One final word before I leave, you tell anyone about our encounter and Nick will watch you getting fucked by both of us. After that, we'll kill him in front of you and leave you alive. You can live out your days knowing you killed him."

"What will the pills do?"

"It won't kill you. Instead it'll just look like you took pills to get high. That's exactly what you'll tell people."

"Why?"

"Why not." He gives me a grin. "Go, now."

Walking up the steps to the apartment it's getting harder to breath. I drop my keys, pick them up, and manage to unlock the door. Once the door is open Nick appears.

"Olivia?" He's looking at me, confused.

"Number one." I utter this under my breath and the world goes dark.


	2. Chapter 2

"Olivia!" Nick is shaking me.

"Ugh, I need sleep. I'm just tired, beyond tired." My speech is slurred.

"Okay." He scoops me up in his arms, taking me to bed.

Once I hit the mattress, I feel better. It's my mattress, not theirs.

"Olivia, are you okay? Should I be worried?"

"Fine." The darkness fully consumes me.

"Get your ass up." I feel the covers being ripped off me. I open my eyes and look around, maybe it was all dream. I inspect my hands, there's still restraint marks.

" _It's so easy with you, I assume Nick doesn't pleasure you the way I do."_

"What time is it." I start stretching.

"Time to get up, you have five minutes."

When I lean up in the bed everything is sore. I manage to get out of the bed, but with intense pain. I look to Nick who looks like he wants to shoot someone. I get up, walking to my closet.

 _I'm digging my nails into my skills, clenching my teeth. It hurts,_

" _Please, you're hurting me." I can barely breathe._

" _Sorry."_

"Why are you in such a bad mood." I'm still in the closet putting clothes on.

He comes back into the bedroom, looking for something. "Oh, I don't know. Let me think for a minute here. Oh yeah, you went out and did who knows what last night."

I get fully dressed and walk over to him, pulling him to face me. I look him in the eyes and touch his shoulders. "Nick, it was a mistake, can't we move on?"

We're both just staring at each other. He pushes me away and walks to the kitchen.

"No, Olivia, this is not something you can simply move on from."

" _Hands on the car and spread them." He starts patting me down and then slips his hand into my panties._

"I need to tell you something." I can't deal with this guilt. I follow him to the kitchen and sit down on the couch.

"Please." He turns to me, arms crossed.

"I cheated on you."

"What?" Nick is shocked.

"At first, I wanted to stop it, but he made me feel good. I'm so sorry." Tears are rolling down my face. Instead of him saying something, he storms out of the apartment.

I get in my own car, and drive to work.

I get to my desk and Nick won't even look at me.

"I have an announcement." Cragen appears, but I don't look up because I'm looking for the phone charger I stashed in this stupid desk. "We have a new addition, Detective Nutley."

"I'm honored and glad to be working with all of you." I freeze. No. there's no way.

I look up at him and he smiles at me.

"Olivia, please come into my office." I follow Cragen.

"You're going to be his new partner. At least for now. I need someone to show him the ropes."

"Captain, can we talk about this?"

"No, you're the best for this job. I know you'll train him well. No more arguing, leave.

I walk out of his office and he's there.

"It's going to be so great getting to know you, Ms. Benson."

" _Please get out of the car, Ms. Benson."_

I'm fuming. First, he violated me, now he's violating my work.

"It's detective Benson, asshole." I storm off to the bathroom. I look back and it seems no one heard my outburst. All I want is Nick's embrace, but he'll never touch me again. I cheated.

 _He keeps his hand in my panties. I'm trying to stop it, but the wave comes over me, my body betraying me. He takes his hand out of my pants and proceeds to handcuff me, laughing._

I am so gross. If anyone knew what happened, I'll be over. I like BDSM. I've done some intense stuff with Nick. I wanted this. If people knew I would never be Olivia Benson again.

I come out of the bathroom to see to see him chatting everybody up. They should know what he did, but they won't. I'm too much of a coward, a hypocrite. This is my life now, I'm trapped.

I go and sit down at my desk, seething. I see Cragen appear once again.

"We have a victim at the hospital. Benson and Nutley go. Remember to teach him Detective Benson."

"I'll drive." I look over at him.

"Great." I grab my phone and follow him to his car.

We get in.

"Was this your plan all along?" I put my seatbelt on.

"No, just perfect timing." He puts his seatbelt on and starts the car.

"I'll expose you. Oh, and where's your friend?" He starts driving,

"We both know you won't, and what he does it his business."

" _I'll do anything, please no more."_

" _Olivia, I never got my turn. I'm getting hard just thinking about my dick in your ass. Let's be honest here, you want it. If you could look at yourself right now."_

" _Please." I feel him get on top of me._

"Why aren't we there?" I pull on my seatbelt.

"Deadlocked." I look around to see no movement and cars surrounding us.

"Great, I have to sit in this car with you for who know how long. I hope you know you're a monster." I cross my arms.

"Olivia, don't disrespect me." His tone is stern.

"Fuck. You." He promptly reaches over and sticks his hands in my pants. I elbow him in the face.

"Wow." He takes a second, I feel the rush of adrenaline.

That win is short lived when I feel his hand grab my neck, squeezing.

"Are you fucking deaf?" I'm clawing at his hand, but it's getting harder and harder to breath.


	3. Chapter 3

Detective Benson and Nutley walk back into the station. Olivia is staring at the ground. Nutley is looking straight ahead.

"That traffic was rough." Nutley goes to Cragen's office.

Nick looks at Olivia. He knows she isn't a cheater. She's off, this whole situation is off. Nick continues to look at Olivia, but that's just not Olivia. He walks over to her who has sat at her desk and pats her shoulder.

"Don't fucking touch me."

"Woah, Liv. I just want to talk." She turns to him, looking him in the eyes, and gets up.

She quickly moves her gaze.

"Nick, do you keep secrets?"

"Of course, we all do."

Olivia looks at him, just staring.

" _I asked, are you fucking deaf." No matter how hard she tried his grip stayed on her throat."_

"Liv." She jumps a little.

"You're scaring me, Olivia."

"I'm scaring myself."

"Talk to me."

Olivia opens her mouth to speak but stops. She keeps her mouth open.

"I need the bathroom." She walks away, going to the bathroom.

Once in the bathroom she stares at whoever is looking at her in the mirror, because that's not Olivia.

" _I know how to block your airways without leaving a mark. Now, if you want to breath shake your head agreeing I'm in control." Olivia does just that._

 _He lets go._

 _She's catching her breath._

 _He reaches over and grabs her gun from her holster. Her eyes go wide in fear. He puts the gun on his lap. Olivia knows if she tries anything right now it won't work, she starts planning._

" _Oh, traffic is moving." There's silence in the car._

 _They get to the hospital. Nutley keeps his gun in his holster and puts Olivia's in his waistband._

 _Olivia is watching him, imagining what his plans are._

 _As they walk into the hospital, she grabs her gun, he grabs her wrist._

" _I will break your wrist. Let go." Olivia does._

 _As they walk through the hospital they look like detectives, not a rapist and his victim._

 _They make it to the victim's hospital room. Olivia looks at her, spacing out._

" _Detective." Olivia shakes her head, bringing her to the present._

" _Yes, hello, I am Detective Benson."_

 _They get back to the car. Olivia opens the passenger side door, he slams the door close._

" _Get in the back."_

" _Why?" He quickly pins her against the car. He brings his lips to her ear._

" _Because I said so." He quickly turns her around, handcuffing her._

 _He then forces her in the back of the car and gets into the driver's seat._

" _What are you doing." Olivia sits up in the backseat._

" _For once in your life, shut up." He starts driving._

" _People will notice how long it's taking us to get to the hospital and back." He scoffs._

" _I took care of that."_

" _I'm sorry, okay? I'll behave. You're in control."_

" _I already know that Olivia." Olivia throws her head back, hitting it on the seat._

 _He finally stops the car, parks it, gets out, and grabs Olivia out of the car. Olivia sees where she's going, she starts fighting back trying to get out of his grip._

" _No. NO! HELP!" He opens the door to the warehouse and throws her down._

 _She lands on her face and is trying to get back up, but it's hard with your hands handcuffed behind your back. He comes over and grabs her hair forcing her to her knees, forcing her to look at him._

" _Back to the scene of the crime." He smiles at her._

The bathroom door slams shut, and Olivia turns her head to look at the door. She doesn't look back at the mirror, just walks out of the bathroom.


	4. Chapter 4

Olivia walks back to her desk. She walks into the bullpen.

 _Nutley picks Olivia up by her hair. She lets out a groan of pain. Instead of throwing her on the bed, he throws her on the ground._

" _You don't have to be so rough."_

" _But I do."_

 _With Olivia on her stomach, he leans under her, undoing her pants. He then starts pulling her pants down. Olivia starts flailing her legs._

" _Help!" He puts his hand over her mouth._

" _Shut up." Olivia bites down on his hand._

" _Fine, we can play that game." He takes her left wrist and snaps it._

 _Olivia lets out a yelp of pain._

" _You cause me pain and I'll cause you pain." While Olivia is recovering, he gets her pants off, and stuffed her panties in her mouth._

" _You gotta admit, this is some deja vu."_

Olivia grabs her wrist. She looks down, it's swollen. Nick walks up to her.

"Can you please talk to me."

"Nick, I don't want to talk to you. Get this through your head, I am broken. You don't want me. Please, just leave me alone. If you ever cared about me, leave me alone." Olivia pushes past him, dizzy.

She's on her way to Cragens office, and Nutley brushes up against her.

 _The floor is so cold, and Olivia can feel the wet spot of her tears._

" _Please, you're hurting me."_

" _That's the point, Liv."_

She knocks on Cragens open door.

"Captain, I don't feel well. Can I please go home?"

"You had a crazy morning, sure." Cragen is preoccupied and seems to be brushing her off.

 _Nutley kicks her in the stomach again._

" _I said, get up." Olivia is on her stomach and is struggling to get up due to the handcuffs._

" _I can't."_

" _Fine." He goes over and picks Olivia up by the hair, kneeing her in the stomach. "Wow, it's a miracle you're up."_

Getting in her car, the dizziness is getting worse. She starts to feel intense pain in her abdomen. She tries to move her wrist, trying to bend it, but can't. She decides she'll just walk home. In her trance she forgot her pocketbook and phone at the precinct. As she's walking the pain and dizziness is getting worse. She falls to her knees, then falls flat on her face, passing out on the sidewalk.

Nick sees Olivia left all her stuff at her desk. Cragen had announced that Olivia left for the day. Nutley comes up behind Nick.

"Why don't I just take those and get it to her."

"Let me."

"Detective, you've done enough damage. Just let me."

"You're right, she doesn't want to see me."

Nutley checks in with Cragen before leaving with Olivia's things. On his way to his car, he notices Olivia's is still there.

Using the keys, she had in her bag, Nutley enters Olivia's apartment. No one is home. He throws all her stuff on the ground and picks up his phone.

Olivia opens her eyes and quickly realizes she's in the hospital. Her abdomen hurts and so she lifts her gown. She sees a bandage and lifts it up, there's stitching.

"Please don't touch that." A nurse walks into her room. "I'm just here to write down your vitals."

Oliva then looks around to see herself attached to all these machines. She tries to move, but her abdomen hurts too much. "It might hurt for a while, just lay down and rest. Someone will be here to talk to you in a minute."

"When can I leave?"

"Someone will be here shortly." The nurse walks out of the room.

Olivia turns and looks at the screen showing her heartbeat.

"Hello, I'm Steven. Can I ask who you are. We didn't find any identification on you."

"Olivia, Olivia Benson."

"Okay, well you came into the hospital because you passed out on the street. When you were brought in you seemed to have many contusions and bruises that seem fresh, broken wrist, broken nose, and internal bleeding. You had to have surgery to stop the internal bleeding, that's why you have a bandage on your stomach. The reason I'm here and not a doctor is because of your injuries. Having a doctor come in here has upset people in the past. Doctors aren't trained in this area."

"I'm sorry I don't understand."

"It seems you were assaulted in some manner, possibly even today." There was loud beeping due to her increased heart rate.

Olivia stayed silent.

 _I own you. I own your pussy. Say a word about what I did to you, Olivia, and I will kill Nick in front of you._

"Let me tell you something about me. When I was 15 years old a friend's father sexually assaulted me. He was the captain of the police department and so I didn't tell anyone until I was 20. Not telling anyone what happened ate me up inside. I even contemplated suicide, but if I had just reached out it could have been easier and better." Olivia started crying.

"I-" Olivia was cut off.

"Hello, I'm Detective Nutley from SVU. Someone called about a possible victim." Olivia's heart rate skyrocketed. The nurse from before came back in, telling both Steven and Nutley to give Olivia some space.


End file.
